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Moskovsky Komsomolets, October 23 2002

Indecent Proposal. The right-wing are once again considering a marriage of convenience

By By Alexander Minkin

Another attempt by the democrats to unite has proved abortive. Or rather an attempt by their leaders. Boris Nemtsov explained this failure on TV, saying with a jeer that "the bride who is past her prime is too capricious and choosy.

- Do you mean Yavlinsky here? - asked the Anchor.

Nemtsov fidgeted and assumed a shifty expression, but didn't answer yes or no. However, everybody understood that he clearly meant to say Yavlinsky.

As soon as the spectre of elections appear on the horizon, obscenities about the bride being "past her prime" immediately appear in many newspapers, as if on command. Obviously the organizers of these publications believe that this is the most powerful weapon against YABLOKO.

It is unimportant whether Nemtsov hooked on to this from his boss or invented it on his own. As this is the main argument, let us take a closer look, while sticking with the proposed vocabulary and style of popular TV shows.

We are talking about the union of the main democratic parties: YABLOKO and the Union of Right-Wing Forces (SPS). Nemtsov is angry with his bride. This means that he must be the groom.

He is behaving very indecently. A real man doesn't publicly disgrace his bride. And the bride (and Yavlinsky was once the champion boxer in Ukraine) should slap such a groom in the face.

Nemtsov the groom was speaking about the age of his bride with the terrible lascivious grim of a lover of nubile young girls. But youth does not constitute an advantage for a political union, and baseness is no temptation.

Is the groom young? SPS is a young name. But look at its five heads - these are all old well-known acquaintances: two former prime ministers, two former first deputy prime ministers and one lady of no specific age. They are responsible for eliminating the population's savings, vouchers, the default in 1998 and an infamous attempt to switch to Volga cars (Ed. Allusion to Nemtsov's populist call to all state officials to switch from foreign cars to Russian Volgas, manufactured in Nizhni Novgorod. Nemtsov was governor of this city).

The groom, now called SPS, used to call himself "The Democratic Choice of Russia". He has been asking for his bride's hand since 1995. And every time he is turned down, he becomes petulant: the bride is old, slow-witted, poor.

But if she is so bad, then why do you keep chasing her? She is not running after her groom, you are chasing her. First Yegor Gaidar prevailed on her, then Chubais, and now Nemtsov.

Wait a minute, what is the sex of the groom? Logically female. She has been sleeping with everyone - Yeltsin, Lebed, Berezovsky and Putin and has also constantly slept with the IMF.

No, the SPS is the bride, an experienced woman, who has slept around, learned all the positions and earned money. It is not surprising that members of the SPS (the most loyal and oldest supporters of Gaidar) married Berezovsky. And then they publicly confessed that it was a marriage of convenience. This was strictly in line with a Russian proverb "when eating and drinking they called him gentle names, and when they finished, shouted farewell, you outcast."

Yes, Nemtsov wears trousers, but everyone can wear trousers now. He outdid the poor solders on the horizontal bars, didn't he? But if they had been fed as he has been, had the same sporting equipment and massageurs...

No, if you go with the logic and indecent coquetry, under all primary and secondary political signs SPS is a lady, who is distasteful in all respects. How could anyone bond with her?

She has been calling the groom-Yavlinsky - a bride and talked about him with undisclosed hatred. It is quite obvious that she does not share any ideas with YABLOKO. She only wants his money and votes.

The political leaders don't need to unite: their voters should. If we talk about the parties... It is improper to pour cognac and cheap wine into one bottle - you should compete for clients.

And the one selling cognac should realise that cheap wine sells better.

That is why it is so cheap.

See also:
State Duma elections 2003

Moskovsky Komsomolets, October 23, 2002

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